From the instant messaging archives:
TRANSMODIAR: "Are you really okay with me rewriting your episode reviews?"
ME: "I really like all these jokes you add to my reviews. I think you should rewrite everything I write."
TRANSMODIAR: "Just sent you a new review, check it out."
ME: "Sure, just let me dry off first."
TRANSMODIAR: "Dry off?"
ME: "Yes, I'm wet."
TRANSMODIAR: "Why are you wet?"
ME: "I was in the bath."
TRANSMODIAR: "Good to know."
**
TRANSMODIAR: " -- and I've set a schedule on the site for the next round of stuff, take a look."
ME: "Sure, but I'm not logged into the CMS on my tablet; let me get out of the bath first."
TRANSMODIAR: "Wait -- you're NAKED right now?"
ME: "Yeah, I always take a bath this time of the day and catch up on my messages."
TRANSMODIAR: "Okay then."
**
TRANSMODIAR: " -- and I said I wanted it in my personnel file that that person coming after me was COMPLETELY CRAZY."
ME: "You've led quite a life."
TRANSMODIAR: "Did you ever read my political blog?"
ME: "I bookmarked it on my laptop; let me get out of the bath and I'll re-read it. I remember you having a lot of truther style conspiracies."
TRANSMODIAR: "Again with the bath!"
ME: "What?"
TRANSMODIAR: "I do NOT need to know that you're in the bath! I don't need to know that you're naked when we're instant messaging!"
ME: "Oh."
TRANSMODIAR: "Oh, check out the website preview for the REBORN section in the redesigned site layout when you're dry and wearing clothes."
ME: "I'm looking at it now and crying."
TRANSMODIAR: "What? WHY ARE YOU CRYING?"
ME: "The SLIDERS REBORN section. It's beautiful. It's a dream come true. Thank you."
TRANSMODIAR: "You're welcome. Look, we can talk about SLIDERS REBORN and whatever you want; just don't tell me when you're taking a bath. I don't need to know."
ME: "Okay."
**
TRANSMODIAR: "What're you up to right now?"
ME: "I cannot tell you."
TRANSMODIAR: "What are you doing, burying a dead body?"
ME: "No."
TRANSMODIAR: "Then why can't you tell me?"
ME: "You said not to tell you."
TRANSMODIAR: "Are you taking a bath right now?!"
ME: "You said you didn't want to know! Why are you asking?"
TRANSMODIAR: "I'm sure you're doing SOMETHING ELSE as well!"
ME: "Yeah, I'm looking at flights to San Francisco."
TRANSMODIAR: "You visiting family or friends or something?"
ME: "No, I was thinking I'd go for a week, see the sights and write in landmarks and geographical references for the SLIDERS REBORN scripts."
TRANSMODIAR: "You are out of your god-damn mind."
ME: "What?"
TRANSMODIAR: "Don't fly to San Francisco for fanfic! Just use Google Maps!"
ME: "Oh, okay. I suppose you're right."
TRANSMODIAR: "Are you still in the bath?"
ME: "You said not to tell you. Why are you asking?"